Obituary of Thomas Riley Hardgrave

Tom was born in Tulsa  and had great memories of growing up along the “Sand Springs Line”...Penny Park, Mark Twain Elementary School,  Grace United Methodist Church , trolley car rides to downtown Tulsa for a movie and hot dogs at Coney Island.  

Tom graduated from Central High School in 1963, and his three years of drafting classes helped prepare him for his beloved career of residential construction.   While still in high school he designed a home for the parents of a friend.  In 2023 he and his wife Charlotte were able to locate that home near the current Central High School.  Tom completed his last home for a friend on  Lake Keystone in early 2019.  He made many lasting friendships with homeowners and was proud that he lived in  neighborhoods where he built!

Tom and Charlotte were married when he was  the manager of Accent Framing in London Square.  Tom had learned the art of picture framing while he worked  at an art gallery and frame shop  in Utica Square;  but in the early 1970’s ... .and for  the next twenty years,  he was involved in the design, manufacture and sale of kitchen and bath cabinetry.  As a part of the Jay Rambo Company, Tom saw home construction change from “job built” cabinets to ones that were modular and built off site. 

Tom gained real estate experience as an associate broker with John Hausam Realtors; and his construction career began  with his partnership with Duane Mueller from Bartlesville.  Tom looked at  possible  building sites and decided that the Keystone Lake area had potential; and his first three homes were completed in Wekiwa Hills in 1993.  Working as a partner and independently, Tom helped design and build over 100 homes, and most of the homes were in the Sand Springs and Mannford areas.

Tom was preceded in death by his parents, James Riley Hardgrave and Winifred Holland Hardgrave and his sister, Carolyn Hardgrave Lederer.

His family fondly remembers his sense of humor and creativity; and will always love him in spite of his strong opinions.  Tom never missed an opportunity to remind a server that their restaurant was remiss by not serving both Coca Cola and Pepsi. ( Of course, he only reminded the server  if they didn’t serve Coke! )  And if the host would ask if he had reservations, he would reply,”Yes, but I’ll eat here anyway!”

Tom met Charlotte Sheryl Dormire in September of 1969, and they were married on Christmas Eve, 1969.  Christopher Riley  was born in 1972 while they lived in Tulsa; and Sara Cathlene was born in  1977 while they resided in Broken Arrow.  Tom remembered 1977, not only as the year he got a new daughter …but a new house, new car and a new sailboat!   During the 70’s and 80’s,  he enjoyed  sailing alone or racing with his friends at Windycrest Sailing Club. Tom served as commodore  of Windycrest in 1984.  But weekends were also spent on Boy Scout campouts with son Chris or Camp Fire outings with daughter Sara. 

Grandchildren were not added to the Hardgrave family until Tom and Charlotte moved to the Sand Springs area.  Trips to the Tallgrass Prairie, Keystone Lake  and The Gathering Place will be remembered by Sara and Paul Keleher’s children Josh, Jason and Joy.  Christopher’s son Riley is  the youngest and  the “local” grandkid  who was often picked up from Anderson School by Grandma Charlotte and Papa Tom. 

Tom also leaves behind an Uncle, Lee Phillip from Belleville, Illinois; and a multigenerational list of nieces and nephews scattered from Tulsa and Red Rock, Oklahoma ... .to Utah, Washington and to Chico, California.

Tom was  a member of the  Roundtable and Genesis Sunday School Classes at Boston Avenue United Methodist Church.  And this past July, Tom completed fifteen years of regularly  swimming at Ascension St. John therapy pool.

In 2018, Tom was diagnosed with chronic microvascular disease.  Yet, Tom was able to actively participate in activities with family and friends until recently.  Vascular dementia is an ugly disease; but Tom, with wisdom and humor, was wise to understand that  for the safety of others and himself….he would be the navigator and leave the driving to Charlotte!   The Alzheimer’s Association does research on all areas of dementia,   In lieu of flowers, Tom’s family asks that you consider making a donation to the Tulsa  area Chapter of Alzheimer’s Association 6660 South Sheridan Road, Suite 202, Tulsa, Ok 74133.

Ninde Funeral | Mosaic Memorial Cremation | (918) 742-5556 | ninde.com